The boys behind London club night Daddy Issues present their list of the world’s most damn fine ‘daddies’…
We don’t give a f**k about famous people, but if we met Gerard we would get super weird… super fast.
He’s got those slightly droopy, bottomless pools of brown bedroom eyes that we could literally stare into forever.
Best hairy chest EVER. Hands down. And moustache for that matter.
The face! The giant shoulders! And this one was GAY!
Tom of Finland
Not the actual Tom that drew all those sexy men but any of his characters will do. Unrealistic body proportions, sexy body hair, peachy bums and well everything these are to me is what Jessica Rabbit is to straight men… Daddy paradise.
We can’t even look at this guy for too long. Like, that chest. That beard. The fur. Omg. PLEASE DADDY.
We never fancied this guy when he was younger, but the older he gets, the fitter he becomes. So groomed and well-dressed. Plus, a real father. D-I-L F.
Ned has all the morals and values you can wish for. Like a good Christian, he likes to help his neighbours, has a moustache and loves working out, he enjoys gardening, cooking… you do the math. We are surprised he never came out in The Simpsons, left his family, started wearing chaps and working in a leather bar. Good old Ned!
Mufasa is the ultimate dad. He is a king, he has great hair, a super sexy voice and of course, he gets killed creating a trauma for all generations to come. Awww. Mufasa, why??? Thank you Disney Corporation, you have so much to answer for. We also blame you for the happily ever after! And for all the unrealistic expectations people have and for the #relationshipgoals. Where is our prince? Fuck you Disney, you are the root of all evil.
That moody girl’s dad in Twilight
We were hoping the dad and the werewolf will hit it off and have some kind of sexy animal sexathon in the forest, she was too moody and the vampire was ugly so yes, that should had been the plot of the movie.
We love Drakes Dad dancing, we’d love to see him doing the Hotline Bling dance at our party!
THE MOST PERFECT PENIS WE’VE EVER SEEN.
A daddy that knows how to dress is a rare but beautiful find.
ASS FOR DAYS.
Only one Smurfette for like 1000 Smurfs… You know what really is going on in smurftown and Papa murf is having the time of his life! He is also a sexy silver fox and likes to wear red. We are sure his mushroom shaped house has some good parties going on! Those blue mofokers are always up for a good time.
The sort of “straight” guy you’d like to come see you after six beers.
That voice. It touches you in nooks and crannies we didn’t know we had. Plus, he’s sporting a beard these days. Que fuerte, papasito.
Chief Hopper (Stranger Things)
There is a fair bit of dad crumpet in this Netflix show, but Chief Hopper takes the cake. A big, burly, brave bear. TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF, MR HOPPER!
We always loved a bit of Joey on Friends. Any time they got him to take his shirt off it was a treat, as he had a lovely thatch of chest hair under those sweaters. But now, oh my, he’s a salt and pepper Papa. With a barrel chest and a thick grey beard. How. You. Doing.