entertainment

Troye Sivan 'cried and felt sick' when he realised he fancied Zac Efron

The 'Bloom' singer's journey to self-acceptance wasn't an easy one.

2018-05-14

He might be one of the world's biggest gay pop stars and happily coupled up with model Jacob Bixenman, but Troye Sivan hasn't always been so comfortable with his sexuality.

The 'My My My! ' singer came out publicly to world on YouTube in 213 at the age of 18 and has since made queer themes an integral part of his work since, but as the 23-year-old reveals in Attitude's new-look June issue - available to download and in shops now - his journey to self-acceptance wasn't always a smooth one.

Asked when he first realised he had feelings for other men, Troye, who is set to release his second album Bloom this summer, says: "It was really early on. When I was about five, I remember feeling like I was scared because I knew something was different about me. I always felt that I kind of knew.

"My parents were always really open-minded, I didn’t grow up in a homophobic household at all, but even so, somehow I knew that it was not the norm and I thought that it was not OK.

Troye Sivan, shot exclusively for Attitude's June isse by Damon Baker

"Even at a really young age, I don’t know where that influence came from but it was there."

Troye recalls how as he hit adolescence, his feelings towards men began to turn sexual - something that sparked a hidden inner turmoil that lasted for most of his early teens.

"I remember I cried when I realised that I thought Zac Efron was really hot. I cried. And felt really sick," he says.

"And that was that same thing, it wasn’t: 'This is just a little crush on a boy or something like that: I’m not just interested in this boy — I think that he’s hot.' And that was weird for me."

It was only after opening up about his sexuality to a close friend at the age of 15 that Troye began to finally feel comfortable with his sexuality.

"I went away and started doing my research, that was when I started to become a lot more comfortable," he explains.

"I watched coming out videos on YouTube and heard people speaking about their experiences and realised that I wasn’t a freak."

Read Troye's full interview in Attitude's new-look June issue, which also comes with a second cover featuring Sir Ian McKellen.

Buy now and take advantage of our best-ever subscription offers: 3 issues for £3 in print, 13 issues for £19.99 to download to any device.