10 things we’ve learned from Madonna’s Ghosttown video
By Ben Kelly
Last night Madonna premiered the video for her second single from the Rebel Heart album, Ghosttown. The post-apocalyptic video sees the Queen of Pop drawn together with Empire’s Terrence Howard after they literally find themselves as ‘two souls in a ghost town’. Here are 10 things we learned from the whole endeavour:
1. There’s been a nuclear apocalypse and Madonna is one of the few survivors.
OBVIOUSLY. We’re only surprised Oprah isn’t in the bunker with her, live tweeting it on a diamond encrusted iPhone. Anyhow, absolutely nothing can keep Madonna down. Not even a uranium fission explosion fit to wipe out a continent.
2. This is very important: her hair looks amazing.
She must have nipped to Toni and Guy while the evacuation sirens blared, because she has a banging ‘do in that bunker. We’re loving the new long, loose curl that says ‘I’m nifty at 50’ and ‘I’m sturdy in hostile nuclear environments’.
3. She wears the capes, the capes don’t wear her.
There’s a subtle reference to Capegate here as Madonna heads up the stairs triumphantly, with an emerald green cape flowing behind her, and actually makes it to the top this time. Later, Mr Howard pulls it off her and throws it at the camera. Note how it’s been attached to her by the shoulders and not round the neck. #neverforget
4. Curiously, the gap between her two front teeth is back.
It’s as defining to Madonna as masochism or narcissism, and yet we’ve all seen the iconic gap between her two front teeth draw closer together in recent years, quite like she and ex-hubby Sean Penn. Now they’re further apart than she and Christopher Cicconne, post-tell all book. Is it an optical illusion? Has she had cosmetic surgery to make her teeth look 25 again? Speculation at Attitude HQ is that she merely looks this way because she has her grills in. Obvs.
5. It’s been a long time since Madonna has used public transport.
The city has been annihilated by a nuclear bomb, and yet Madonna seems oddly hopeful she might be able to hitch a ride in a burned-out taxi.
She’s unlucky.
She also comes to the realisation that this roundabout is only taking her round in circles and isn’t progressing her journey, or crucially, her career.
6. Pay phones are a dead end.
Yeah that’s not going to work. It’s a barren post-apocalyptic wasteland, you’re not going to be able to call Lola to defrost the chicken before you get home.
7. She’s channeling The Babadook/Stevie Nicks.
We actually love this outfit, and can’t quite decide whether she’s paying homage to The Babadook, Stevie Nicks in American Horror Story or Johnny Depp in anything. It’s quasi-Victorian, which matches her accent impeccably. Regardless, she looks amazing, and we’re loving all the outfits in the Rebel Heart campaign so far.
8. It all gets a bit much and she needs a brief rest.
The only thing more exhausting than a rigorous world tour is seeking shelter in a post-apocalyptic landscape, so M has a seat on the fanciest upturned patio she can find and waits there, striking an incredible pose.
9. She gets with a guy her own age.
When Terrence Howard comes along, he doesn’t immediately recognise her, and almost shoots her. ALMOST SHOOTS HER. (Why?)
Anyway, just at the right moment, she gets up and is all ‘Bitch, I’m Madonna’, which must have been a nice surprise for him when you think about it.
Then they dance a tango and it’s beautiful.
10. She adopts a stray child at the end.
Because philanthropy is eternal.
Watch the wonderful video in full below.
[youtube height=”HEIGHT” width=”WIDTH”]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GgDxv0Qg_Rg[/youtube]