TV Pick Of The Week: ‘Gay Sex, Apps And Me’

Grindr, eh? What’s it all about? Well, if you’re on this site, the answer is probably “I know exactly what it’s about thank you, I’ve been using it for bloody ages, even if SW16 is a bit thin on the ground when it comes to hunks”.

But even if you are some kind of sex-app-veteran (burgh), my pick of the week is Gay Sex, Apps And Me, a short ‘doc’ (documentary) available on 4OD that looks at the emergence of apps such as Grindr, Scruff and a couple of others that I hadn’t even heard of.

It’s presented by Harry Hitchens, a cheery, charming YouTube personality who writes things, says things, and shoots things (with a camera, not a pistol) for a living. Harry is 19, and came out last year via the medium of a ‘vlog’ (that’s a ‘video blog’, keep up at the back), so he’s in quite a good position to be examining the current state of digitally-charged sex in gay culture.
Grindr has been around long enough now for its conception not to seem particularly sensational, but for Harry, it opens up a whole new way for him to figure out his identity as a young gay man.

He talks to sexual health experts about how these apps are fuelling STIs and chats to a few people who use the app (one guy uses it several times a week, and even invites Harry into his room to show him where “the magic” happens).

Then Harry looks at other ways men find sex; there’s a good bit where he walks onto a nudist beach to meet up with someone, but this gentleman gets a bit freaked out about being on camera. Oh, and then he goes cruising in some bushes with a night vision lens, which looks terrifying.
What’s really quite sweet is, for someone whose grown up in such a digitally-native environment, Harry finds the whole Grindr thing a little bit awkward and awful. We see him getting to grips (figuratively, no laughing at the back thank you) with it, chatting with guys and generally trying to figure out if it actually has a place in his life, and it’s refreshing to see someone inundated with pictures of torsos take a step back and say well, this is all a bit vapid really, isn’t it?

Of course, it’s easy to say that in the middle of the afternoon with a camera crew around you, and in truth the doc only really scratches the surface; yes, these apps can feel sleazy (everyone’s been offered £40 to jizz in a sock at some point) but they can offer a sexual liberation to gay men who don’t have a strong LGBT support network in real life.

But this doc is more about Harry’s experiences, rather than making broad strokes (again, no laughing please) about the state of gay dating on the whole. And Harry is a perfect person to explore this topic; he’s warm, energetic and enthusiastic and he’s happy to pull his sleeves up and get stuck in (seriously, stop laughing, these are figures of speech).

The big question, though: does Harry find a suitable suitor? You’ll have to watch a find out.

Gay Sex, Apps and Me is available on 4OD now. To read our interview with its presenter Harry Hitchens click here.