Luke Evans opens up about growing up gay and a Jehovah’s Witness: ‘I had no one to talk to’
The actor will publish his memoir, Boy from the Valleys: An Unexpected Journey, in November
By Alim Kheraj
The actor and musician Luke Evans has opened up about his difficult experiences growing up gay while being raised as a Jehovah’s Witness, revealing he believed his sexuality was a “death sentence”.
The 45-year-old Hollywood star shared details of his upbringing during an interview with The Guardian, ahead of the publication of his upcoming memoir, Boy from the Valleys: An Unexpected Journey.
In the interview, Evans spoke about his devoutly religious parents and the belief held among Jehovah’s Witnesses that homosexuality is wrong. The religion, which is a denomination of Christianity, believes that the end of the world, or Armageddon, is nigh.
“All that was in my head was: if I don’t sort this out, I’m going to lose my mum and dad” – Luke Evans
Despite the church’s stance on homosexuality, the actor shared how he was baptised in the church aged 13 after he became aware of his sexuality
“I thought maybe by doing that, the rest would disappear,” he said of the decision, hoping that it would offer him salvation. “I was so confused, and I had no one to talk to. The only thing I could talk about to people I knew was the religion. It consumed our conversation. I thought, well, focus on something else and hope the other thing goes away.”
Evans said that the congregation he was a part of would “read scriptures saying terrible things about the way I was feeling and who I was possibly turning into”.
“All that was in my head was: if I don’t sort this out, I’m going to lose my mum and dad. I’m going to lose everything I’ve ever known and I’m also going to die at Armageddon, so I’m giving myself a death sentence unless I sort his out,” he said.
The Beauty and the Beast actor said that his primary concern was being ostracised by his family, especially after he accepted his sexuality.
“To be happy, there was only one route I could take, and my only worry was that I’d lose Mam and Dad in the small period I had before Armageddon came,” he said. “I had to make this decision: either you keep lying and live this life that is making you very unhappy or you take the risk and hope they don’t cut you off and pretend that you are dead.”
Evans later did come out to his parents in his early 20s, a move that resulted in him being disfellowshipped from the church, something he said was a relief.
“But it was painful,” he added, “because I knew my mam and dad were sitting in that Kingdom Hall surrounded by people that knew them and knew me until I was 16. It must have been a horrible moment for them. I think they just went home, hugged each other and got through it.”
The actor said he didn’t feel any anger about what he experienced in the church, especially because of how the religion has affected his parents.
“While all this stuff that was happening to me was not pleasant, and I’d never want anyone else to go through it, I see two people who have found a life that works for them,” he said. “They have wonderful friends, inside and outside the religion.”
Meanwhile, Evans’s memoir, Boy from the Valleys: An Unexpected Journey, is published on 7 November.