Cara Delevingne shares her journey with gender identity in new BBC show
“I had a lot of internalised homophobia and shame. I thought that I was abnormal.”
British model and actor Cara Delevingne opens up about her journey with her gender identity when growing up left and says that it left her feeling suicidal.
Speaking in her upcoming BBC documentary Planet Sex with Cara Delevingne, the 30-year-old who identifies as gender-fluid and pansexual explains that she wrestled with understanding her own identity as a teenager.
“I couldn’t talk to anyone about it,” she says in the documentary. “I had a lot of internalised homophobia and shame. I thought that I was abnormal.”
“I thought about ending my life, like I had multiple times, and I’m so glad I didn’t because if I can help any other kid that means the world to me,” the 30-year-old continues. “It means the world to that little queer kid I was. Or I am,” the Independent reports,
At the end of episode four, she says of her gender identity, “I am a ‘she’ right now. But I also like dressing up as a man and being a ‘he’. You don’t have to put so much pressure on yourself about what you are, who you are. Whether it’s masculine and feminine, it’s just who I am,” the BBC report.
Discussing this scene in the documentary, she says, “the constructs and binaries that are given are stupid,” and declared that while she is proud to be a woman that doesn’t mean she has to sit in a label box.
“I’m definitely genderfluid,” she adds. “I love playing with what we’ve been given as those gender constructs. Being super femme, being super masc, mixing it all up in one big cauldron.”
Planet Sex with Cara Delevingne is her first presenting role and she shared she felt “really, really proud of what we created,” in conversation.
The show tackles subjects like gender, monogamy, and sexuality to interrogate stigma and progress across the world while speaking to scientists, artists, and activists.
In turn, Deleveigne notes her own world was opened up: “Most of my friends are straight… I’d never been to Pride before making this show. I’m not saying you have to go to Pride to be a “good gay”, there’s no such thing as good or bad gay, but I just felt that there was more that I could have done with my voice and my platform.”
In making the show, she reveals she’d “gotten a lot more entrenched in the community,” and subsequently has “a lot more queer friends now.”
The Suicide Squad actor also opens up about her journey with gender identity: “It didn’t feel weird until I got older, when everyone in society made me feel different.”
“It just confused me that everything was so gendered and boys’ toys were blue and girls’ toys were pink. It was just weird,” she added.
She concluded with the aim of the show: “If we can change anyone’s minds to be more willing to accept themselves, or someone else, that’s all I want.”
Planet Sex with Cara Delevingne debuts on BBC Three on 1 December at 10 pm. Need support? Call Samaritans on 116 123 from within UK or Republic of Ireland or email jo@samaritans.org.