Transgender Day of Remembrance 2024: Esther Ghey on creating ‘lasting positive legacy to help other people like Brianna’
In this exclusive interview, Esther Ghey, mother of our 2024 Legacy Award winner Brianna Ghey at the Virgin Atlantic Attitude Awards, powered by Jaguar talks about how she's using the memory of her daughter to bring about positive change to the community
By Dale Fox
Last year in Warrington, Cheshire, Brianna Ghey‘s life was cruelly cut short at just 16 years old. The transgender teenager was brutally murdered on 11 February 2023 in Culcheth Linear Park. Two 15-year-olds, Scarlett Jenkinson and Eddie Ratcliffe, were later convicted of her murder, with the judge citing transphobia as being one of the killers’ motivations. Now, at the Virgin Atlantic Attitude Awards, powered by Jaguar, Brianna has been honoured with a posthumous Inspiration Award, in recognition of the profound impact of her life and the legacy that continues in her name.
To understand the true significance of Brianna’s life, Attitude spoke with her mother, Esther Ghey. Through her words, we gain a poignant glimpse into Brianna’s world, her struggles, and the remarkable initiatives that have blossomed in her memory.
“Even if we went into, say, ASDA, shopping, she would be doing cartwheels and flips down the aisles”
Esther paints a vivid picture of her daughter’s early years. “When Brianna was little, she was a very hyperactive child,” she recalls fondly. “She was really into gymnastics. She’s got her sister who’s a couple of years older than her, and they had a really lovely, close relationship.” This sisterly bond was particularly evident in their shared passion. “It was Alisha who first started gymnastics,” Esther explains. “Brianna would watch Alisha do gymnastics and try to copy her. Alisha would actually teach her.”
Brianna’s enthusiasm for gymnastics wasn’t confined to the gym. Esther chuckles as she remembers, “Even if we went into, say, ASDA, shopping, she would be doing cartwheels and flips down the aisles. I just couldn’t keep her under control.”
As Brianna grew older, she faced various challenges, however. School wasn’t always easy for her. “She wasn’t really academic,” Esther explains. “She struggled with dyslexia and later on in life she was diagnosed with ADHD. I think school was quite a struggle for her.”
Despite these setbacks, Brianna found joy in the social aspects of school life. “Before the pandemic hit and everyone was locked down, she enjoyed going to school, and she had some really close friends,” Esther recalls. “Everyone knew who Brianna was. She was very outgoing and kind of put herself through school like she owned it.”
“She just kind of morphed into Brianna quite seamlessly”
At around 14, Brianna came out as transgender. Esther’s response spoke volumes about the unconditional love and support Brianna found within her family. “It wasn’t a massive surprise,” she says. “It wasn’t something that was a massive issue to the family or anything. Obviously, as a parent, you have worries that maybe she’s making life more difficult for herself because of the opinions of others. But really, she just kind of morphed into Brianna quite seamlessly.”
Like many of her generation, Brianna was active on social media, particularly TikTok. While this platform allowed her to express herself and connect with others, it also exposed her to dangerous influences.
Tragically, Esther discovered after Brianna’s death that her daughter had been viewing harmful content online.
“She’d been accessing pro-anorexia pages… and also self-harm forums where people encourage each other to self-harm,” Esther reveals. This revelation has fuelled her determination to raise awareness and push for change in how online safety for children and teenagers is approached.
“People were messaging me on social media and saying how much Brianna would actually help them in their life”
Despite the negatives of the online world, Esther has found some comfort in learning about the positive impact Brianna had on others through social media. “After Brianna was taken from us, I heard from quite a lot of people online. People were messaging me on social media and saying how much Brianna would actually help them in their life and their transitions or finding out who they are as a person. And that’s something that I’m really proud of Brianna for.”
Indeed, Brianna’s willingness to help others was a defining characteristic of hers. “She had a friend called Amelia, who she was really close to. I think that they kind of helped each other as well because I think both of them felt quite lonely and isolated,” Esther says. “I think she had the time to speak to everybody; I don’t think that she ignored anyone.”
That said, Brianna’s battles with mental health in her daily life were significant. Esther shares, “She had anxiety, she had an eating disorder, and she was self-harming. She had anxiety to the point where she would self-isolate.”
“She just wanted to be a normal teenager”
Despite these struggles, Brianna had dreams and aspirations for her future, just like any other teenager. “She couldn’t wait to be 16 because she was going to get a little cleaning job and she wanted to do hair and beauty and she wanted a pink car.” At the same time, Brianna harboured ambitions of TikTok fame, much to her mother’s amusement.
Yet beneath these aspirations was a deeper, more poignant desire. “I think Brianna just craved that normality,” Esther reflects. “She just wanted to be a normal teenager.”
“I want to create this lasting positive legacy that’s going to help other people like Brianna who are suffering right now”
In the wake of Brianna’s death, Esther has channelled her grief into creating positive change for young people. She launched the Peace in Mind campaign and established Peace and Mind UK, a community interest company. “I want to create this lasting positive legacy that’s going to help other people like Brianna who are suffering right now,” Esther explains.
The initiative focuses on two main areas: introducing mindfulness in schools across England and making the online world safer for children. The mindfulness programme has already shown promising results in Warrington. “We’ve got over 100 teachers that have signed up to the training,” Esther reports. “Emma Mills, the head teacher at Brianna’s school, has been really instrumental in helping with this.”
As part of sharing Brianna’s legacy, Esther organised a festival in September to mark her daughter’s passing. “We had teepees with meditation, sound baths, yoga, and Crystal, a Shetland therapy pony,” she enthuses. “[Trans rights campaigner] Jaxon Feeley came along and did a talk as well.”
“She would be proud of herself, and rightly so”
When asked what Brianna might think of these initiatives, Esther laughs, imagining her daughter’s typical teenage response: “Oh my God, Mum, you’re so weird. You’re so embarrassing.” But she adds, “I do think that deep down she probably would be proud, but she wouldn’t let me know that.”
The posthumous Inspiration Award for Brianna at the Attitude Awards recognises the impact of her life and the positive influence she had on others — which continues today.
When asked how Brianna would feel about receiving this award, Esther responds, “I think that she would be really proud. She would be proud of herself, and rightly so.”
This is an excerpt from an interview in the Attitude Awards issue 2024. To read the full interview, order your copy now or check out the Attitude app.