Whitbread’s Adam Chater shares LGBTQIA+ adoption advice: ‘Don’t let stigma or myths stop you’

“There’s a myth that LGBTQIA+ people can’t have children.” Adam Chater, Hotel Manager at Whitbread, always knew he wanted children. After meeting and falling in love with his husband, Andy, they both had their hearts set on growing their family. After considering different options, they landed on adoption – understanding that there is a huge importance in giving a child who needs a loving family a safe place to call home.

“Children find themselves in circumstances through no fault of their own,” Adam says. “And adopted children deserve that loving care just as much as anyone else.” At just two years old, the little boy they welcomed into their family was considered an “older child” by adoption standards. As a child gets older, their chances of adoption decrease, so Adam was adamant in letting the agency know this wasn’t a barrier for them.

So, Adam and Andy’s world grew as they added a little boy to their family. Now four, he’s completely changed their lives, but only for the better, explains Adam. He adds that the adoption process can seem scary, but it is worth it, and their agency, Adoption@Heart really supported them throughout the journey, making it just that little bit easier.

“LGBTQIA+ adopters are so well equipped to support adopted children”

“He’s my world and seeing him grow is such a pleasure. I think often people are scared off by the process because of the meetings with social workers. You have to talk quite openly about your life. For LGBTQIA+ people, this can put them back into a vulnerable place, which can be quite hard. But if you can do it, it’s a real strength because that’s what these children are going through too. This is why I think LGBTQIA+ adopters are so well equipped to support adopted children because of the lessons their own life experiences have given them.”

Adam sees himself just how his own life experiences have made him a better parent, friend, and colleague. Growing up just outside of Birmingham, in Kingswinford, alongside his family, Adam was drawn to languages and the allure of travel early on. Fuelled by this, he enrolled in a French and Spanish degree program at the University of Bath. These four years became a pivotal time in his life. He not only honed his language skills but began to explore and better understand his own identity.

During Adam’s studies, he embarked on a placement year that led him to work for Disneyland Paris, discovering his love for hospitality. This, coupled with a brief stint at American Airlines in Madrid, solidified what he already knew – that this was the career path for him. Another defining moment Adam remembers vividly from his studies was coming out during Freshers Week. It allowed him to finally build connections based on genuine authenticity and live without pretence. This newfound confidence led him to share this part of himself with his family later that year, a journey he was grateful to say was met with unwavering support.

“I’m passionate about our LGBTQIA+ inclusion because everyone deserves to feel accepted”

Joining Whitbread as a graduate, Adam has made his way up the ranks over the past decade. He takes immense pride in the strides the company has made in fostering inclusivity, ensuring that every person feels respected and valued within the organisation. He explains that Whitbread understands the significance of creating a supportive environment, recognising the true value that diversity brings to the table.

The hospitality company runs many of the UK’s most loved brands, including over eight hundred hotels. Adam is now the Hotel Manager for two of Birmingham’s biggest Premier Inn’s. This encompasses running a team of over one hundred, and he feels there is immense importance in ensuring every single employee and customer that walks through their door truly feels accepted and welcomed.

“I’ve had a really supportive journey, but I’m also aware that other people aren’t always as lucky,” adds Adam. “That’s why I’m passionate about our LGBTQIA+ inclusion because everyone deserves to feel accepted.”

Part of Adam’s work in creating a genuinely inclusive environment has been his involvement with the company’s LGBTQIA+ network, GLOW. His role represents operations, and the network allows LGBTQIA+ voices across the business to be heard and represented. Just a snapshot of their work has included raising money for LGBTQIA+ charities, improving policies, and achieving first place for hospitality in the Stonewall Index.

Adam also meets regularly with Whitbread’s Managing Director as part of the reverse mentoring programme, building informed allies in all parts of the business. “He’s so passionate about change within our organisation and very curious. He’s constantly wanting to know more and always striving to be a better ally,” explains Adam. “It’s been a great way for me to influence change on a more senior level and advocate for the needs of the LGBTQIA+ community.”

“Don’t let stigma or myths stop you from achieving what you want”

Adam also feels hugely grateful for the support Whitbread showed his adoption journey. It’s not a straightforward process – you don’t have an exact timeline or often even know what date your adoption might take place till right before. Adam’s team was incredibly flexible when he needed time off to meet with social workers and had a great adoption package, meaning he was able to take the time off to spend with his child to form that vital bond.

If there’s anything Adam could tell other potential adoptive parents, it’s “Don’t let stigma or myths stop you from achieving what you want.” He hopes more and more LGBTQIA+ people realise this is a rewarding and wonderful option available to them. It’s a journey that comes with challenges, but it’s always worth it, he shares. As with many adopted children, his little boy had quite a traumatic start to life. This meant that he was initially very shy with other people. But seeing this change as he has come out of his shell has been incredibly rewarding to Adam and Andy.

“Seeing that growth just makes you feel so proud. He’s now a completely different child. He couldn’t really talk to start with. He had about three words when he first came to us at two years old, which is unusual. So, he was quite a late talker, but we’ve been filled with pride with every word he’s learnt.” The nursery Adam’s son attends even celebrated World Adoption Day last year. He put his hand up proudly in front of all the other kids, declaring: “I’m adopted, and I have two daddies!”

“It’s so important for people to feel loved and accepted so that they can always be their true selves”

Going back to work, Adam felt torn. He wanted to do the best job he could do while being the best parent. The added flexibility and support of his team means he always has enough time for his son, admitting there is no better feeling in the world than when he picks his son up from nursery and sees him run out the door into his arms.

Adam’s journey highlights the importance of challenging stereotypes, embracing authenticity, and fostering acceptance in all aspects of life. Whether he’s showing up for his family or co-workers, his dedication to creating a world where everyone can be their true selves is apparent. “It’s so important for people to feel loved and accepted so that they can always be their true selves. There are still things that are happening daily, where unfortunately, we don’t have the equality we need across the world. Demonstrating that that fight is not over.”

Whitbread is a proud partner of myGwork, the LGBTQIA+ business community. Find out more about job opportunities at Whitbread.