‘Schools must listen to trans and non-binary+ young people if they want to embed true inclusion’

When I think about school, the first thing that crosses my mind is how uncomfortable I felt in that environment as a young trans person. Sure, I was hiding the development of my gender identity from my parents at home, but school was no means of escapism from this.

Throughout my time in school, gender was presented in an ‘oil and water’ sort of way – the concept of “boys and girls” were separate, with no crossover or alternative.

I went to a mixed primary school, where pupils were only referred to as “boys and girls”, and an “all-boys” secondary school. As a trans pupil this was particularly hard, and made me wonder why education is so often selective based on students’ sex. 

I remember being eight years old and for the first time [finding] some clothes that weren’t in line with how I was “supposed” to dress. At such a young age, I was already worried about judgment from my peers, my family and society in general. Occasionally I’d wear them but only ever on my own. When I turned nine, I ditched them amongst the mess of coats and bags of my Year 5 classroom when nobody was looking.

By the time I started secondary school, a supposedly “all-boys” school with a mixed sixth form, my instinct to match my gender presentation to my developing identity had increased. 

My secondary school, unlike my primary school, did speak up to some extent about the LGBTQ+ community, however the G in LGBTQ+ always seemed to take precedence. 

Throughout my time at school, they maintained a separate uniform policy for boys and girls, and the first time I ever even heard a teacher talk of transgender people in an even remotely mature manner was in my final year, in 2018. Despite same-sex marriage being legalised in 2014, and the UK reaching its peak ranking in the ILGA Rainbow Index in 2015, change was painfully slow. 

Thankfully, the school eventually ditched the binary gendered Sixth Form uniform policy in the early 2020s, and in 2023 it introduced skirts and tights as a uniform option for the supposedly “all-boys” portion of the school. 

But in late 2023, five-and-a-half years after I’d finished Sixth Form, I found myself heckled by some of the school’s current students as we crossed paths on our respective ways home from work and school. They hurled anti-LGBT+ names at me on multiple occasions, and eventually I reported the incidents to the school. 

I got in touch with my former school to report the harassment but unfortunately the response was disappointing. It made me realise how far we still have to go to make LGBT+ young people feel safe in school.

They assured me that pupils received “thorough education in PSHE lessons”. It felt frustrating that LGBT+ people were being limited to just a single lesson, when we’re here at school everyday – many of us facing bullying, harassment and a lack of safety.  

I really wished my former school had been more receptive. Here’s what I wish teachers would do to support trans and non-binary pupils. 

Trans students use the toilets too, so gender-neutral loos and facilities would be incredible. Not marking existing toilets with stick people wearing a skirt or no skirt is a great way to start too – clothes have no gender! 

You can also add your pronouns to your email signature, and include students’ pronouns on registers, so teachers are aware. These small changes show trans young people that school is a safe and welcoming place for them.

Visibility is also really important. I would encourage all schools to increase trans, non-binary and gender diverse representation across the curriculum, support LGBT+, trans and gender diverse charities, display a variety of LGBT+ flags, and expand the language on various pages of the school’s website, instead of assuming that every pupil will be cisgender. 

Some of these things might be really new to your school but many are simple and easy to  implement, yet would have a hugely positive impact for young people like me. 

Since leaving school, I have joined the charity Just Like Us as an ambassador. This means I go into schools to share my story of growing up LGBT+, becoming the positive representation for those pupils that I never had when I was at school.

I hope that the talks I provide in schools allow children to see and respect each other for who they are. I hope that the rest of the students listening will understand that another child’s gender and/or sexual orientation is just a harmless part of their identity. I hope every LGBT+ young person can accept and love themselves from the get-go; that any and every LGBT+ child is safe from institutionalised discrimination or marginalisation. I hope that every LGBT+ child feels able to be themselves at school and can confidently speak up if they’re being mistreated.

And lastly, I hope that by sharing my story, I can encourage schools to try one of these actions to make their classrooms a little safer for trans pupils.

Angus Natalie is ambassador for Just Like Us, the LGBT+ young people’s charity. LGBT+ and 18-25? Sign up now!