Interview | First transgender star of TLC’s ‘Undressed’ dishes on her experiences on the show
By Josh Lee
TLC’s new show, Undressed, turns dating on its head – by asking participants to strip off and hop into bed on their first encounter.
Okay, for some of us that might not be the most unfamiliar dating strategy, but in a world full of Take Me Out, it’s certainly a new spin on the TV dating format. And tonight (October 26), the show will be helping to break down stigma with its first transgender participant, 30-year-old Jossy.
While Jossy was initially hesitant to appear on Undressed, she decided to take the opportunity to be a “positive role model” for trans people in the UK. We caught up with Jossy to find out how she got on ahead of tonight’s show.
What motivated you do apply to be on the dating show?
I was asked to do the show by producers. Before hand I would never have thought to go on a show like that. But when I was approached and they explained what the show was, I though “Well, why not give it a go?” to see what its like. I was a little bit hesitant about opening up about being transgender because, even though I am transgender, it’s not really the thing that defines who I am. I didn’t just want to be the transgirl on the show; I wanted to be like any other competitor. Then I guess on the other side of that, if you are in the media you have a duty to acknowledge that fact you are transgender because there will be people out there who maybe at the start of their journey. I wanted to be a positive role model on TV, and be relatable.
There is a lot more in the media about transgender people but not that much on transgender people and dating and what its like.
When I said yes to the show one of the things I did was look to see if there had been any other trans people on dating shows and there hasn’t really. The only times I’ve noticed there being transgender people on dating shows, they’ve normally been the butt of the joke. If you think 12 years ago there was that show about Miriam [Channel 4 show There’s Something About Miriam] where the joke was the she was transgender. I think its about time that transgender people are on dating shows just as everyone else.
What was you experience on the show?
Well the producers have been absolutely fantastic. They made sure I was comfortable with everything. They made it very clear I wasn’t on the show because I was transgender. I thought because I’m on the telly it was opportunity to raise awareness. They said if I was comfortable to talk about it then that was okay. I went with the attitude that I was only going to mention it if the opportunity came up. You never know how people are going to react, I had never met Chris before so I wanted to get a little idea of what Chris’ personality was and during the date the question came up “Are you open minded?” I said “I am a very open minded person I don’t judge people by their past, I’m more interested in the future.” Then he said that he has dated a transgender girl before so then me being me said “Was she pre- or post-op?” he told me that she was post so then I said that I’ve had gender reassignment surgery. It was totally natural, because he has dated someone that has been through that and felt comfortable to say he had. His response was a very natural response. I wasn’t offended when he said “Oh so you used to be a bloke?” If I wasn’t on telly I would have done the biggest eye roll. I then explained to him that I wasn’t born a man I was born me. The date really wasn’t about me being transgender, it was just a question that came up. He genuinely didn’t know that I was transgender.
On TV it is a big deal that you’re transgender as there is so little representation in the media.
That’s why I say I think you need to acknowledge it. I have fully transitioned to be a woman, I haven’t transitioned to be transgender. I will acknowledge that that it’s my past and that is the world I come from. So if one or two people are watching that show and get a little bit of inspiration or understanding then that’s good.
After the show, do people stay in touch? Did you keep in touch with Chris?
We kept in contact on Facebook but I just think ultimately I went on that show to find someone who is closer to home as I am a very busy woman. I don’t have time to travel, I don’t have time for long distance relationships. There is no ill feeling there. I talk on dating as transgender but I can’t say that my experiences will be the same as everyone else’s.
Had you been dating before the show?
I’ve had relationships in the past. I’ve had serious relationships in the past, then I moved country. In the run up to the show I was single and it seemed like an interesting way to meet someone. There is still a stigma attached to transgender women unfortunately. I think we need to find ways to get rid of those stigmas. There are so many ways people identify these days and that’s brilliant but there are still girls like me who identify as women. For girls like me it’s good to have people out there who highlight these issues.
Jossy appears on Undressed tonight (October 26) at 10pm on TLC.
Interview by – Shon Faye
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