Joe Stone: “Here’s what our REAL ‘gay agenda’ should be”
By Nick Bond
A lot can happen in 21 years. Since Attitude first opened up shop in 1994 we’ve seen the repeal of section 28, the lowering of the age of consent and the introduction of equal marriage. Incredibly, at the time of launch, Harry Judd’s pecs were a mere glimmer in his future personal trainer’s eye. We had no idea that in years to come they would feature on our front cover approximately 17,000 times, and be scorched onto our collective memory for all eternity.
We’ve come a long way – as has Harry. There’s no denying that many battles have been won, but I think we’ll all agree that there is still room for improvement in the next two decades, not least among ourselves. We often hear about the mythical gay agenda (in the right-wing press mostly where it relates to… baby stealing and the election of Cher as world leader?), but perhaps it’s time we actually agreed on an action plan to get our house in order. Here is my suggested gay manifesto for the next 21 years:
A cut-down on camp-shaming
There was a furore earlier this year when Russell Tovey expressed his relief that going to a tough school allowed him to escape his destiny as a ‘really effeminate, tap-dancing freak’. “If I’d have been able to relax, prance around, sing in the street, I might be a different person now”, he said. He later apologised for the remarks, which felt symptomatic of a wider issue with gay men, who often present ‘straight-acting’ as the ideal. Clearly, there is no problem with being a butch gay man. But we need to move away from the idea that camp gay men are somehow inferior, or doing the rest of us a disservice. Acceptance doesn’t count if the cost is never being able to be yourself. Let’s make it so that everyone feels able to – in Russell’s words – relax.
Commitment to Trans rights
Last year I wrote about how gay people needed to get on board with trans issues, and the conversation has moved on significantly since then. Thanks to people like Laverne Cox and Caitlyn Jenner, trans visibility is at an all-time high, and it feels like progress is being made at lightning speed. It’s a really exciting time, but there is plenty more to be done. Trans people are currently fighting for many of the rights that gay people have won – often with the support of the trans community. We must do everything we can to return the favour, that’s just good manners.
Increased sensitivity towards coming out
Do you know what makes my piss boil? When a celebrity comes out and commenters below the line write ‘how is this news?!’ It’s news because high profile people still feel pressured to stay in the closet, so when they don’t it’s unusual – simple. Equally aggravating are the gays on my Facebook who triumphantly bleet ‘Well that was obvious!’ as if someone else’s complex reasons for not disclosing their sexuality are pawns in a never-ending game of one-upmanship. In a perfect world people wouldn’t have to come out. Until then, if someone tells us they’re straight, or gay, or a tea pot, it is not our place to contradict them.
State-subsidised coming out care packages for all gays
These should include a Mr Porter gift card, a meet-and-greet with Beyoncé and legal entitlement to commandeer the music at all straight house parties. If we have to put up with people looking at us meaningfully and asking ‘when did you know?’ this is the least that we should be able to expect in return.
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